1989

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dragon53
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1989

Post by dragon53 » Wed Apr 01, 2015 7:01 am

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 1

THE SKY IS FALLING---the 25th James Bond movie has Bond retired from MI6, living as a recluse in the Swiss Alps and suffering from PTSD after killing countless Bond Villains and bedding countless Bond Girls. 007 comes out of retirement to team up with his estranged lover, who is a beautiful CIA agent, after desperate pleas from Queen Elizabeth and M to save mankind from Ernst Stavro Blofeld and SPECTRE. The evil organization has threatened to drop hundreds of EMP bombs from satellites in the sky on the US which will cause power outages at all US military bases, the White House and golf courses unless the US pays the sum equaling the national deficit which is about $19 trillion. Daniel Craig, Margot Robbie and Ralph Fiennes star. Sam Mendes returns as director. The script is by Neal Purvis and Robert Wade.

SHARKNADO 8 VS. JAWS 4---Steven Spielberg directs this Syfy sequel to his classic 1975 JAWS. It is set on Amity Island in the present where the grandson of the original great white shark is the star attraction of the local seaquarium which draws thousands of tourists. After a freak Sharknado drops hundreds of deadly sharks onto Amity Island, the great white shark battles the newly-arrived sharks to see who can inflict the greatest bloodbath on the residents of the seaside community. Chris Hemsworth stars as Sheriff Aaron Brody, grandson of the original movie's Sheriff Martin Brody. Jennifer Lawrence stars as his estranged girlfriend, Alexandra "Alex" Canfield, who is also the beautiful, Harvard-educated, world's leading expert on giant shark battles at seaside communities. They team up with Fin (Ian Ziering) and April (Tara Reid) to save Amity Island from the bloodiest shark attack in history.

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PREDATOR: THE PREQUEL---20th Century prequel underway in which Dwayne Johnson stars as the sole surviving Green Beret from the downed helicopter in the original movie. He is stalked by the Predator's co-pilot, who has landed in the jungle to investigate the self-destruct explosion which killed his commanding officer Predator. Jean-Claude Van Damme, Michelle Rodriguez, Dave Bautista, Terry Crews, Steve Austin and Randy Couture co-star as the special ops team sent in to investigate the disappearance of the first special ops team which was sent in to investigate the missing Green Beret team.

THE GOOD, THE BADDEST AND THE UGLIEST---Timothy Olyphant stars in this reboot underway of the classic Clint Eastwood Western in which a feared gunslinger seeks gold buried in a town stricken by a zombie plague.

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TORA! TORA! TORA!: CONSPIRACY OF INFAMY---Oliver Stone sequel to the 1970 movie about the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. Stone's conspiracy theory is that Franklin Roosevelt and Winston Churchill knew of the upcoming attack on Pearl Harbor after US intelligence broke the Japanese code and conspired to let the attack proceed so that isolationism among Americans would end and allow the US to enter World War II and help England before it was defeated by Germany. The cast includes Sean Penn, Charlie Sheen, Ashton Kutcher, George Clooney, Ben Affleck, Alec Baldwin and Ken Watanabe.

UNSOLVED MYSTERIES: THE MYSTERIES CONTINUE---ABC reboot of the series that ran on NBC and other networks from 1987-2010. The three premiere segments include:
1. "The Bermuda Triangle: Flight 19"---did Flight 19, five Navy TBF Avenger bombers, disappear in an energy vortex created by the lost continent of Atlantis?
2. "Roswell Revisted"---did aliens from another planet crash while investigating the world's only atomic bomb base at Roswell AFB?
3. "Miley Cyrus: Superstar"---did she sell her soul to the Devil to have such enormous popularity?

The reboot will be hosted by Pierce Brosnan and his wife, Keely Shaye Smith, who was a correspondent on the original series from 1994-1997.


THE ADDAMS FAMILY---new NBC reboot of the 1960s ABC sitcom about a weird and ghoulish family. The reboot stars Kim Kardashian, Khloe Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, Bruce Jenner, Kris Jenner, Kylie Jenner, Kendall Jenner, Kanye West, Kris Humphries and Ray J.

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BOURNE FREE---Matt Damon returns in the latest sequel in which ex-CIA assassin Jason Bourne comes out of retirement to free his estranged lover from the Russian mob after she was kidnapped because she is the CIA agent who discovered the Russian mob is controlled by a former KGB agent. Amy Adams and Vladimir Putin co-star.

X-MEN: X-RATED---the final movie in the franchise will go out with "a bang" and will feature graphic sex and violence involving Jennifer Lawrence, Halle Berry, Patrick Stewart, Rebecca Romijn, Hugh Jackman, Peter Dinklage, Ellen Page, Ian McKellen, James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Famke Janssen and Anna Paquin.

DARBY O'GILL AND THE LITTLE BIG PEOPLE---Tim Burton sequel underway to the 1959 Walt Disney movie. Johnny Depp stars as the world's tallest leprechaun who will grant three wishes and a pot of gold to the person who catches him. Helena Bonham Carter, Christopher Lee, Dustin Hoffman and George Lazenby star.

PRINCESS DIANA: MURDER BY THE YARD---Jennifer Love Hewitt stars in this Lifetime tv biomovie in which Princess Diana was murdered by Scotland Yard and MI5 in a Royal Family conspiracy to prevent Diana's baby from being born because the father was commoner Dr. Hasnat Khan.
Last edited by dragon53 on Wed Apr 01, 2015 12:46 pm, edited 3 times in total.

[CAT]CplSlade
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Re: 1989

Post by [CAT]CplSlade » Wed Apr 01, 2015 12:32 pm

Um, April Fools?

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